Heartbreak cuts us to the bone, humbling us before the great forces of the Universe. But our tendency to avoid and protect ourselves from pain clouds our vision and prevents us from seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. It alienates us from recognizing the purpose of heartbreak. So often, we remain in denial and ignore the call from our emotions, numbing ourselves to the effects of grief. We fear confronting the new world that now awaits us in our vulnerability. We fear creating our post-heartbreak identity that is more or less a mirage—a distant and attractive mirage but a mirage nonetheless.
Since the beginning of time, we have looked up at the stars and wondered. Big questions came to mind; how was the world created, what is our place in the universe, are we alone in our struggles, can we improve our relationships? We told stories around a fire to share our concerns, visitors recounted theirs, and we passed them down to our children.
In the modern world, men are expected to achieve outward “success.” You may feel that success means a good career with recognition for your accomplishments and financial reward, a family, and a network of friends. I imagine you have worked really hard at whatever path you have chosen and still put in long hours. If that traditional path has not been yours – my message still applies – there is still a cultural pressure to have “exterior success” that determines your self-worth.
In reality, the English language has only one word for love. Borrowing from Greek, we see that the words, Eros, Philia and Agape help in the expansion of our consciousness about different aspects of love. If nothing else, we discuss that love exists in the unity of a plurality of feelings. There are many aspects of love and yet paradoxically, there is a unity in the diversity of the several aspects.
Fathering reflects a universal symbolic pattern in the individual and collective, conscious and unconscious. We come into this world needing a father, his recognition and to be lovingly seen by him. We innately require a nurturing and caring father figure while his lack of presence affects a daughter’s mind, body and soul.
Sexual dreams can teach us a lot about our current relationship – and help us to change it for the better. Dream interpretation in the sense of “one dream image has one meaning for everyone” is a misleading way of looking at dreams. In fact, the only person who can really know for sure what his/her dream means is the dreamer.
A woman dreamt she was to take care of her father. The meaning of this dream depends on the dreamer and can mean many things about the relationship with her father. Why is she to take care of him? What is the dreamer’s desire, and what are the implied wounds? Jung said, “The father is decisive in the destiny of the individual .”This quote reminds us of the value of a loving father for a daughter’s growth.
In workshops on the grieving process over the years, I have witnessed how grief work opens one to wonder, enables one to be surprised by the unexpected and unnoticed miracles in the mundane, the extraordinary that is nestled in the folds of the ordinary, like the play of light and shadows revealing the hidden dimensions of a landscape that one has perhaps passed by so often and without notice, or the beauty of the rose that softens sorrow.
Home! What images does this word conjure up in all of us? What memories, desires, hopes and feelings arise from the depths of the soul with the very speaking of the word? Home is at the heart of these blogs because each in its own way has considered how Covid-19 is awakening this archetypal image, which is perhaps the first, oldest and deepest root of our ties to the world and which sets the rhythms of our existence as a journey between birth and death.
How could we even consider the possibility of any connection between wisdom and virus? Framed as a question, the theme of this blog is intentionally a challenge, which is designed to make us pause. Virus belongs to the lowest possibility of life on the planet, a protein bundle on the very boundary between living and non-living entities. Wisdom belongs to the highest capacity of human reason.
Mary Shelley’s story of Victor Frankenstein retells the Christian story of creation in which Victor Frankenstein is the new creator god who would make use of the powers of science and technology available in his time to create a new race of beings who would never know the stain of death. In her story, the creature that Victor creates abandons, and then would destroy, haunts his maker from the margins where his side of the story waits to be told.
In Mary Shelley’s story, Victor Frankenstein and the ‘Monster’ personify two opposite attitudes toward the natural world. Frankenstein intentionally cuts himself off from the natural order and rhythms of nature, eschewing the beauty of the changing seasons, refusing to be distracted from his work to reanimate dead matter. In his obsession, he adopts a purely utilitarian attitude toward the natural world.